I've been thinking a lot lately about the reaction I get from my friends when I talk about what I do for "work".
Not sure I'm a fan of that reaction.
Picture it.. you're sitting around with your friend, and you're bitching/whining/complaining or recounting your day at work.. or something happened to you at work and it relates to the conversation you're having with your friend .. pretty normal, right?
Ok.. now pretend I'm the friend ... I'm sitting there.. listening .. commenting ... equally engaged in the conversation... when I interject with something about my work. Normally, the conversation just kind of flows, right?
Doesn't feel like that in my case for some reason.
What it feels like to me, is that I bring up anything to do with what I do for a living, and the other person goes through some metamorphosis within themselves.. like what I do is create the plague in little test tubes and I'm just waiting to release them to an unsuspecting world. Weird, right? Yeah... that's what I think too. *With the exception of just ONE friend.*
I work in the Financial Services Industry. In fact.. I L.O.V.E. what I do, and what I can do to help people just like me... in fact, if you're my friend, I'm more inclined to tell you more about it, and even relate a lot of conversations towards it .. especially if you're complaining that you're broke, tired, work too much for too little, get no respect at work... see where I'm going?
Now.. if I just worked at a bank, or with a mortgage company, or with a law firm, or with some kind of company that could take a look at your financial outlook and see if there was anything better you could be doing, you might be interested in what I do a little more, instead of going through that THING that goes on... you might put me on your list of people to go see if you needed something that I do. In fact, what I do does all of those things and more! Pretty neat, right?
But for SOME reason... I'm excited about what I do - I'd even go so far as say that I'm passionate about it... and my friends.. those people in my life that I care the most about, get a little freaked out that I might ask them to let me see if there's anything that I can do to help them out.
"I/we don't want to share our financial stuff / mix business with people we're CLOSE to."
"I/we have a "guy" for our financial stuff and we're doing great, but thanks!"
"I hate being this broke..."
"I'm so sick of my job."
I can understand that some people are sensitive about their finances.. especially when they're not that great, and that feeling that sharing that kind of information might change your friendship.
I totally understand that if you've got someone handling your financial investments, that you believe you are in the best situation you can be in.. because, after all, they're a "professional".
I can relate to being broke too... so much so that I've turned down many a lunch date, evening out, going to celebrate someone I really care about's birthday/wedding/baby shower or even one of their home parties because I didn't feel comfortable about sitting through something I couldn't contribute to.
And most certainly, I can definitely sympathize about hating your job. You get up every day, shower, do your hair, put on make up, sit in traffic on the way there, probably hurried to arrive somewhere that you don't feel appreciated for your efforts, to get back into traffic with other disgruntled commuters, to rush home to make dinner just so you can sit down and relax and actually spend some time with your family or get a moment to yourself.
But...
Do you realize that you aren't alone? And the fact that you're NOT alone should change your perspective about relating that to your friendship - it should make it a little stronger. It's like sharing a secret... the bonds grow deeper. But if you look at the statistics - Canadians are spending $1.50 to every $1.00 they earn. Really. For every dollar we're spending, some of it is going to some kind of 'credit'... and that 'credit' is throwing our family, friends, loved ones, ALSO in debt. All of us. You, me, them ... everyone. Pretty scary, isn't it?
Talking to someone that actually cares about you about your finances and who genuinely wants to show you where you're at now, and in the future, AND help make it better for you is someone that has a lot more invested in your best interest than a stranger.
Being broke shouldn't be the main thing you have to complain about. Don't you really deserve to go for lunch with the girls, out for dinner with your other half, buy something just *that* fabulous for your girlfriend just because you saw the perfect thing? Don't you deserve to take that vacation this year without having to worry about the money you'll miss for being off for a week or two? I know I do.
And work.... working for someone else can be great.. as long as you're appreciated for what you have to offer the company, if you're given bonuses for all the hard work and even overtime you put in, and you get paid appropriately for the job you do. There shouldn't be someone doing the same amount of work you do that gets paid more than you... should there? How about the amount of time that you aren't spending with your family because you're working for someone else? Shouldn't you be able to go see your child/grandchild at their school concert during the afternoon or chaperone on a field trip if you could? How about that you can't book an urgent dentist or doctor appointment after work because they're all booked up from 4-5pm for months in advance, so you have to miss work to go... is that fair?
And what about that once upon a time 'earned time off' holiday time... trying to book time off during peak seasons can be brutal!
What I do helps people just like you... like me.
What I do offers other options, and so far that I've seen, BETTER solutions to what you're already doing financially.
What I do could be something that YOU could do, and it doesn't mean you have to have all kinds of credentials to do it.
What I do is something that I'm PASSIONATE about. I believe that I have the power and now, a whole lot more knowledge than I did before to help me and my family and even future generations of my family to be better than they have been in the generations before me.
So, let this be the one and ONLY time that I apologize that I love what I do, and that I believe wholeheartedly that what I do and what I know could help you, your family, and/or someone that you love be better in their financial life... and that I want so very much to share that information with you... that power.. that knowledge... and quite possibly.. the freedom to own your life again.
But I won't apologize that I'm going to do it for myself and my family... despite how you feel about it.
.. and remember to try to pretend that you care about what my job means to me as much as I pretend to care about what your job means to you.
If I didn't love you, care about you, or want to see you succeed just like I believe you do for me.... I wouldn't even bring it up.
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