Sunday, December 18, 2011
Friday, December 16, 2011
So... what do you do?
I've been thinking a lot lately about the reaction I get from my friends when I talk about what I do for "work".
Not sure I'm a fan of that reaction.
Picture it.. you're sitting around with your friend, and you're bitching/whining/complaining or recounting your day at work.. or something happened to you at work and it relates to the conversation you're having with your friend .. pretty normal, right?
Ok.. now pretend I'm the friend ... I'm sitting there.. listening .. commenting ... equally engaged in the conversation... when I interject with something about my work. Normally, the conversation just kind of flows, right?
Doesn't feel like that in my case for some reason.
What it feels like to me, is that I bring up anything to do with what I do for a living, and the other person goes through some metamorphosis within themselves.. like what I do is create the plague in little test tubes and I'm just waiting to release them to an unsuspecting world. Weird, right? Yeah... that's what I think too. *With the exception of just ONE friend.*
I work in the Financial Services Industry. In fact.. I L.O.V.E. what I do, and what I can do to help people just like me... in fact, if you're my friend, I'm more inclined to tell you more about it, and even relate a lot of conversations towards it .. especially if you're complaining that you're broke, tired, work too much for too little, get no respect at work... see where I'm going?
Now.. if I just worked at a bank, or with a mortgage company, or with a law firm, or with some kind of company that could take a look at your financial outlook and see if there was anything better you could be doing, you might be interested in what I do a little more, instead of going through that THING that goes on... you might put me on your list of people to go see if you needed something that I do. In fact, what I do does all of those things and more! Pretty neat, right?
But for SOME reason... I'm excited about what I do - I'd even go so far as say that I'm passionate about it... and my friends.. those people in my life that I care the most about, get a little freaked out that I might ask them to let me see if there's anything that I can do to help them out.
"I/we don't want to share our financial stuff / mix business with people we're CLOSE to."
"I/we have a "guy" for our financial stuff and we're doing great, but thanks!"
"I hate being this broke..."
"I'm so sick of my job."
I can understand that some people are sensitive about their finances.. especially when they're not that great, and that feeling that sharing that kind of information might change your friendship.
I totally understand that if you've got someone handling your financial investments, that you believe you are in the best situation you can be in.. because, after all, they're a "professional".
I can relate to being broke too... so much so that I've turned down many a lunch date, evening out, going to celebrate someone I really care about's birthday/wedding/baby shower or even one of their home parties because I didn't feel comfortable about sitting through something I couldn't contribute to.
And most certainly, I can definitely sympathize about hating your job. You get up every day, shower, do your hair, put on make up, sit in traffic on the way there, probably hurried to arrive somewhere that you don't feel appreciated for your efforts, to get back into traffic with other disgruntled commuters, to rush home to make dinner just so you can sit down and relax and actually spend some time with your family or get a moment to yourself.
But...
Do you realize that you aren't alone? And the fact that you're NOT alone should change your perspective about relating that to your friendship - it should make it a little stronger. It's like sharing a secret... the bonds grow deeper. But if you look at the statistics - Canadians are spending $1.50 to every $1.00 they earn. Really. For every dollar we're spending, some of it is going to some kind of 'credit'... and that 'credit' is throwing our family, friends, loved ones, ALSO in debt. All of us. You, me, them ... everyone. Pretty scary, isn't it?
Talking to someone that actually cares about you about your finances and who genuinely wants to show you where you're at now, and in the future, AND help make it better for you is someone that has a lot more invested in your best interest than a stranger.
Being broke shouldn't be the main thing you have to complain about. Don't you really deserve to go for lunch with the girls, out for dinner with your other half, buy something just *that* fabulous for your girlfriend just because you saw the perfect thing? Don't you deserve to take that vacation this year without having to worry about the money you'll miss for being off for a week or two? I know I do.
And work.... working for someone else can be great.. as long as you're appreciated for what you have to offer the company, if you're given bonuses for all the hard work and even overtime you put in, and you get paid appropriately for the job you do. There shouldn't be someone doing the same amount of work you do that gets paid more than you... should there? How about the amount of time that you aren't spending with your family because you're working for someone else? Shouldn't you be able to go see your child/grandchild at their school concert during the afternoon or chaperone on a field trip if you could? How about that you can't book an urgent dentist or doctor appointment after work because they're all booked up from 4-5pm for months in advance, so you have to miss work to go... is that fair?
And what about that once upon a time 'earned time off' holiday time... trying to book time off during peak seasons can be brutal!
What I do helps people just like you... like me.
What I do offers other options, and so far that I've seen, BETTER solutions to what you're already doing financially.
What I do could be something that YOU could do, and it doesn't mean you have to have all kinds of credentials to do it.
What I do is something that I'm PASSIONATE about. I believe that I have the power and now, a whole lot more knowledge than I did before to help me and my family and even future generations of my family to be better than they have been in the generations before me.
So, let this be the one and ONLY time that I apologize that I love what I do, and that I believe wholeheartedly that what I do and what I know could help you, your family, and/or someone that you love be better in their financial life... and that I want so very much to share that information with you... that power.. that knowledge... and quite possibly.. the freedom to own your life again.
But I won't apologize that I'm going to do it for myself and my family... despite how you feel about it.
.. and remember to try to pretend that you care about what my job means to me as much as I pretend to care about what your job means to you.
If I didn't love you, care about you, or want to see you succeed just like I believe you do for me.... I wouldn't even bring it up.
Not sure I'm a fan of that reaction.
Picture it.. you're sitting around with your friend, and you're bitching/whining/complaining or recounting your day at work.. or something happened to you at work and it relates to the conversation you're having with your friend .. pretty normal, right?
Ok.. now pretend I'm the friend ... I'm sitting there.. listening .. commenting ... equally engaged in the conversation... when I interject with something about my work. Normally, the conversation just kind of flows, right?
Doesn't feel like that in my case for some reason.
What it feels like to me, is that I bring up anything to do with what I do for a living, and the other person goes through some metamorphosis within themselves.. like what I do is create the plague in little test tubes and I'm just waiting to release them to an unsuspecting world. Weird, right? Yeah... that's what I think too. *With the exception of just ONE friend.*
I work in the Financial Services Industry. In fact.. I L.O.V.E. what I do, and what I can do to help people just like me... in fact, if you're my friend, I'm more inclined to tell you more about it, and even relate a lot of conversations towards it .. especially if you're complaining that you're broke, tired, work too much for too little, get no respect at work... see where I'm going?
Now.. if I just worked at a bank, or with a mortgage company, or with a law firm, or with some kind of company that could take a look at your financial outlook and see if there was anything better you could be doing, you might be interested in what I do a little more, instead of going through that THING that goes on... you might put me on your list of people to go see if you needed something that I do. In fact, what I do does all of those things and more! Pretty neat, right?
But for SOME reason... I'm excited about what I do - I'd even go so far as say that I'm passionate about it... and my friends.. those people in my life that I care the most about, get a little freaked out that I might ask them to let me see if there's anything that I can do to help them out.
"I/we don't want to share our financial stuff / mix business with people we're CLOSE to."
"I/we have a "guy" for our financial stuff and we're doing great, but thanks!"
"I hate being this broke..."
"I'm so sick of my job."
I can understand that some people are sensitive about their finances.. especially when they're not that great, and that feeling that sharing that kind of information might change your friendship.
I totally understand that if you've got someone handling your financial investments, that you believe you are in the best situation you can be in.. because, after all, they're a "professional".
I can relate to being broke too... so much so that I've turned down many a lunch date, evening out, going to celebrate someone I really care about's birthday/wedding/baby shower or even one of their home parties because I didn't feel comfortable about sitting through something I couldn't contribute to.
And most certainly, I can definitely sympathize about hating your job. You get up every day, shower, do your hair, put on make up, sit in traffic on the way there, probably hurried to arrive somewhere that you don't feel appreciated for your efforts, to get back into traffic with other disgruntled commuters, to rush home to make dinner just so you can sit down and relax and actually spend some time with your family or get a moment to yourself.
But...
Do you realize that you aren't alone? And the fact that you're NOT alone should change your perspective about relating that to your friendship - it should make it a little stronger. It's like sharing a secret... the bonds grow deeper. But if you look at the statistics - Canadians are spending $1.50 to every $1.00 they earn. Really. For every dollar we're spending, some of it is going to some kind of 'credit'... and that 'credit' is throwing our family, friends, loved ones, ALSO in debt. All of us. You, me, them ... everyone. Pretty scary, isn't it?
Talking to someone that actually cares about you about your finances and who genuinely wants to show you where you're at now, and in the future, AND help make it better for you is someone that has a lot more invested in your best interest than a stranger.
Being broke shouldn't be the main thing you have to complain about. Don't you really deserve to go for lunch with the girls, out for dinner with your other half, buy something just *that* fabulous for your girlfriend just because you saw the perfect thing? Don't you deserve to take that vacation this year without having to worry about the money you'll miss for being off for a week or two? I know I do.
And work.... working for someone else can be great.. as long as you're appreciated for what you have to offer the company, if you're given bonuses for all the hard work and even overtime you put in, and you get paid appropriately for the job you do. There shouldn't be someone doing the same amount of work you do that gets paid more than you... should there? How about the amount of time that you aren't spending with your family because you're working for someone else? Shouldn't you be able to go see your child/grandchild at their school concert during the afternoon or chaperone on a field trip if you could? How about that you can't book an urgent dentist or doctor appointment after work because they're all booked up from 4-5pm for months in advance, so you have to miss work to go... is that fair?
And what about that once upon a time 'earned time off' holiday time... trying to book time off during peak seasons can be brutal!
What I do helps people just like you... like me.
What I do offers other options, and so far that I've seen, BETTER solutions to what you're already doing financially.
What I do could be something that YOU could do, and it doesn't mean you have to have all kinds of credentials to do it.
What I do is something that I'm PASSIONATE about. I believe that I have the power and now, a whole lot more knowledge than I did before to help me and my family and even future generations of my family to be better than they have been in the generations before me.
So, let this be the one and ONLY time that I apologize that I love what I do, and that I believe wholeheartedly that what I do and what I know could help you, your family, and/or someone that you love be better in their financial life... and that I want so very much to share that information with you... that power.. that knowledge... and quite possibly.. the freedom to own your life again.
But I won't apologize that I'm going to do it for myself and my family... despite how you feel about it.
.. and remember to try to pretend that you care about what my job means to me as much as I pretend to care about what your job means to you.
If I didn't love you, care about you, or want to see you succeed just like I believe you do for me.... I wouldn't even bring it up.
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
It's beginning to look a lot like....
Yup. You guessed it. Christmas.
Time flies when you're actually out there in the world.. doesn't it?
I can't believe how much my life has changed in the past year and a half.
Most of it scary big leaps of faith, some of it, just run of the mill (for me, anyway), disjointed and somewhat askew from what I was expecting, but all of it amazing.
This past June, DH and I celebrated one year together. We combined our families and are looking forward to getting to soon go and physically spend time with his two kids out east. Three kids.. never thought that was what my life had in store, but I certainly don't mind.
We also chose to start in our own business .. the mission statement being " To help families get out of debt, become properly protected, and become financially independent. " and one step and one family at a time, we're doing just that. I LOVE what we can do for people. Though I'm really not sure why (or what it is that Im not doing properly) people aren't jumping to at least have a look at it with me. New things are coming in the future for the company that, along with my own time in the business, will definitely change some of those perspectives, and Im really looking forward to that shift.
Last April we moved into the suburbs of Maple Ridge. I am not surprised that we really all love it out here. Unfortunately, the owners of the home we are renting (sharing with friends), had to be put on the market. The owners moved back to Ontario and can't handle the two mortgages. While I understand this, I can't help but get a little irritated that we've really only JUST moved in, and we are already starting to look around for somewhere else to live here in the area for the "just in case" that the new owners actually want to move in instead of continuing to rent it out to us. That's quite the pressure that I really don't want to deal with.
Now, I realize that I'm not THE best housekeeper.. but the house isn't a disaster ALL the time. I can't believe how anxious I get when the realtors call to let us know when the next showing will be. I don't WANT to have to wash my floors TODAY... I was planning to get them done on the weekend instead, or I don't WANT to have to do all my laundry tonight, but if you want to show the house tomorrow, I don't want it all over the floor in color piles like it is right now. There are just some things you can personally live with (walking around, stepping over, or looking at) that you wouldn't want to share with anyone else... and it feels like every time I let things slide in the housekeeping department, the phone rings, and its the realtor wanting to show the house the next day.
I am, however, thankful that we've been able to be where we are. None of the other places we actually looked at were where or what we wanted. We are lucky to have the school within walking distance for TK and within 5 mins to the office for me... it's cut down on a fair amount of hassles we could have been experiencing. We have also made friends with a few of our neighbors. And we're lucky to have them.
Christmas is coming. The neighborhood is getting all prettied up with lights and other decorations. I've seen people coming and going with their cars full of packages, and know that it's definitely high time we figured out if we're going to try to go for Christmas with DH's family. I know he misses them all. I know I'd love to experience an eastern Christmas.. but the one little thing is that TK probably won't be able to come with us. I don't even want to think about what that argument is going to sound like.. with her OR her father. But... if he says he wants her home, then he will also need to understand that he's the one that gets to deal with her about it too. I'm not the one taking new things away from her.
I love my new business. But I'd also like to help others in another way - de-cluttering. There is much peace for me knowing that I'm helping someone go through boxes and storage of additional "stuff" that's filling their space and occupying more real estate than necessary. I look in our garage and storage shed and think how I'd like to go through more of our things and condense and purge... but also know that I've done it so much that there is really very little to get rid of. We are hoping to have a bigger place so that we can actually USE whatever's still in a box. We bought it for a reason, and we've purged around it, because we know that we do actually want to use it in the future, but know that there really is no actual place to put it right now. Even our bedroom is far too small. Our last bedroom has its own box of things stored away to be pulled out at a later date, in a new space. When we get into that new space, there's a chance that we'll purge it out, but it would be silly to get rid of it right now.
Come the new year, I might post some flyers around the neighborhood... but for now I will wait. Christmas is around the corner, much to be done in our regular business lies ahead, and there's enough going on without adding someone else's stuff. So for now.. Im good. :)
Time flies when you're actually out there in the world.. doesn't it?
I can't believe how much my life has changed in the past year and a half.
Most of it scary big leaps of faith, some of it, just run of the mill (for me, anyway), disjointed and somewhat askew from what I was expecting, but all of it amazing.
This past June, DH and I celebrated one year together. We combined our families and are looking forward to getting to soon go and physically spend time with his two kids out east. Three kids.. never thought that was what my life had in store, but I certainly don't mind.
We also chose to start in our own business .. the mission statement being " To help families get out of debt, become properly protected, and become financially independent. " and one step and one family at a time, we're doing just that. I LOVE what we can do for people. Though I'm really not sure why (or what it is that Im not doing properly) people aren't jumping to at least have a look at it with me. New things are coming in the future for the company that, along with my own time in the business, will definitely change some of those perspectives, and Im really looking forward to that shift.
Last April we moved into the suburbs of Maple Ridge. I am not surprised that we really all love it out here. Unfortunately, the owners of the home we are renting (sharing with friends), had to be put on the market. The owners moved back to Ontario and can't handle the two mortgages. While I understand this, I can't help but get a little irritated that we've really only JUST moved in, and we are already starting to look around for somewhere else to live here in the area for the "just in case" that the new owners actually want to move in instead of continuing to rent it out to us. That's quite the pressure that I really don't want to deal with.
Now, I realize that I'm not THE best housekeeper.. but the house isn't a disaster ALL the time. I can't believe how anxious I get when the realtors call to let us know when the next showing will be. I don't WANT to have to wash my floors TODAY... I was planning to get them done on the weekend instead, or I don't WANT to have to do all my laundry tonight, but if you want to show the house tomorrow, I don't want it all over the floor in color piles like it is right now. There are just some things you can personally live with (walking around, stepping over, or looking at) that you wouldn't want to share with anyone else... and it feels like every time I let things slide in the housekeeping department, the phone rings, and its the realtor wanting to show the house the next day.
I am, however, thankful that we've been able to be where we are. None of the other places we actually looked at were where or what we wanted. We are lucky to have the school within walking distance for TK and within 5 mins to the office for me... it's cut down on a fair amount of hassles we could have been experiencing. We have also made friends with a few of our neighbors. And we're lucky to have them.
Christmas is coming. The neighborhood is getting all prettied up with lights and other decorations. I've seen people coming and going with their cars full of packages, and know that it's definitely high time we figured out if we're going to try to go for Christmas with DH's family. I know he misses them all. I know I'd love to experience an eastern Christmas.. but the one little thing is that TK probably won't be able to come with us. I don't even want to think about what that argument is going to sound like.. with her OR her father. But... if he says he wants her home, then he will also need to understand that he's the one that gets to deal with her about it too. I'm not the one taking new things away from her.
I love my new business. But I'd also like to help others in another way - de-cluttering. There is much peace for me knowing that I'm helping someone go through boxes and storage of additional "stuff" that's filling their space and occupying more real estate than necessary. I look in our garage and storage shed and think how I'd like to go through more of our things and condense and purge... but also know that I've done it so much that there is really very little to get rid of. We are hoping to have a bigger place so that we can actually USE whatever's still in a box. We bought it for a reason, and we've purged around it, because we know that we do actually want to use it in the future, but know that there really is no actual place to put it right now. Even our bedroom is far too small. Our last bedroom has its own box of things stored away to be pulled out at a later date, in a new space. When we get into that new space, there's a chance that we'll purge it out, but it would be silly to get rid of it right now.
Come the new year, I might post some flyers around the neighborhood... but for now I will wait. Christmas is around the corner, much to be done in our regular business lies ahead, and there's enough going on without adding someone else's stuff. So for now.. Im good. :)
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Along came a school day...
Ahhhh... the peace.. the bliss of returning to our "regular scheduled program" so to speak. TK started at her new school yesterday - today being the first FULL day. She can walk to school in 5 mins or so, and has already made a friend or two (and shockingly, remembered their names!)
Update on the new careers - we both passed the government exams! YAHOOOOO!
Now we're just waiting for the Province to sign off on them and put the licenses into effect officially. But Sept now on its way to full swing means that other people's lives will also go back to "normal" and they can see their own schedules better, so appointment bookings shouldn't be as difficult to get as they have been over the summer.
It costs you nothing to let me and my trainer come over and take a look at your situation, do your financial analysis for you and see if there's anything better that our company can be doing for you. So you, as my friend - if you're reading this and I haven't already seen you - would you, pretty please, do me the honor of sitting down with us for an hour? Wouldn't you want to find out if your money's doing what you expect it to do? Wouldn't you want to know if you're being ripped off by the life insurance company you've been with for years? And .. if someone were willing to show you how you can save for retirement, save on your income taxes and come out in the end with enough to be truly financially happy ... wouldn't you let them in?
Update on the new careers - we both passed the government exams! YAHOOOOO!
Now we're just waiting for the Province to sign off on them and put the licenses into effect officially. But Sept now on its way to full swing means that other people's lives will also go back to "normal" and they can see their own schedules better, so appointment bookings shouldn't be as difficult to get as they have been over the summer.
It costs you nothing to let me and my trainer come over and take a look at your situation, do your financial analysis for you and see if there's anything better that our company can be doing for you. So you, as my friend - if you're reading this and I haven't already seen you - would you, pretty please, do me the honor of sitting down with us for an hour? Wouldn't you want to find out if your money's doing what you expect it to do? Wouldn't you want to know if you're being ripped off by the life insurance company you've been with for years? And .. if someone were willing to show you how you can save for retirement, save on your income taxes and come out in the end with enough to be truly financially happy ... wouldn't you let them in?
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Passing pre-exam, and moving forward
I can't explain how absolutely EXCITED I am.. loud enough, hard enough, full enough... and just so busting-at-the-seams HAPPY an excited.. that this momentum is on its way.
* From a seed, knowledge will come... *
It all started when I got a note from my insurance advisor saying that he'd like to meet with me to review a renew of my life insurance policy. Straight forward - however, timing was of the essence. I had to drive all the way to the office to see him at a time that would work for both of us, in and amongst my busy schedule at the time, review my policy and decide if changes needed to be made and he could try to work me into a renewal. In hindsight, that was probably the best thing he could have done for me at that moment of my life.. and of course.. my life insurance coverage!
Life insurance.. Hmm what a concept huh? I finally hit 40, I've had a few different coverages for life insurance and had to let a few go over the years, but all in all, I knew I needed to leave something behind to those that I love and to take care of things after my leaving. So I had it.
I went into his office and sat and read my policy, from what I could understand, and listened to his reasoning for renewing NOW instead of a few years down the road when I was older, explained the difference in cost to me... but not once did he explain that I wasn't going to be covered if I didn't renew it when it was due.... I had no idea what I bought, signed for and was paying for monthly.. except the knowledge that I thought that if something happened to me in the next few years, and I died.. TK was going to have some money left to her. Not a lot either, and again, knowing what I know now - not nearly enough for her to do the things I had in my plans when I purchased it.
I was 30+, a newly single mother, and I just wanted to know that if I were to die, she would be able to pay for the costs that come at my death, and maybe something to invest for her future life that I wouldn't be there for.
My first husband and I paid for our own wedding. We got a bit of help, but it wasn't the extravagant and elaborate that little girls dream of. I borrowed my dress, we picked the sub-par site in the park we wanted to be married in, and 2 wks before the wedding, the catering company/restaurant we planned to hold our reception with, told us that we wouldn't be allowed to have any minors in the building after 9pm... so I called everyone on the list and said"It's now POT LUCK!"
Now skip ahead 10 yrs from that date, and I'm looking over my life insurance policy and worrying about the impending end of its coverage... and I'm seeing how badly that could end up if it were to end in 4 yrs. I don't plan on being dead within 4 yrs... my coverage is a small amount that isn't really based on any tangible numbers other than "Sure - I can afford that."
After that call from the insurance agent, I had some questions, and went to a local businessman and friend and asked what I was really looking at on this piece of paper, what the technical jargon meant, and how it was going to effect me and my current situation.
He came over - we looked at what I had, and we included DH in the process. I found out that my investment wasn't healthy like I thought it should be by now, and that DH and the 3 kids weren't so much as considered along our paths.... time for a change.
Now fast forward back to present day....
This past weekend, DH and I went in and completed our pre-licensing exam for Life Insurance. We passed, and we're both so proud of each other. That wasn't the simplest task I've ever done, but for the first time in a very long time, I was not afraid of failing the exam. I wanted to know what I learned...
Now, I have life insurance that covers me and the three kids, and an investment that is actually moving in an upward motion instead of slowly disintegrating because of inflation rates, potential tax implications etc... an Im on mu way to a new career to help other families and single moms (okay, other people too! lol) ... and I know that what I'm doing now is making a difference for her when she turns 18.
I can't remember how excited I was to write an exam that took many hours to write. I can't remember the last time I looked at myself in the mirror and knew in my heart that I was going to be ok... and if anything happened to me, so would TK.
Did YOU know that there are taxes AT death...? That the government wants money just because we died? I didn't. I also didn't know just how much leaving something for my daughter mattered until that moment that I moved my insurance and investment (though small) somewhere else. Somewhere that was moving my money and it was increasing instead of just sitting around for someone else to take it over.
When my mom died, I had NO idea what was in the wil. I could barely function then between new baby and caring for my mom's failing health on a daily basis. If she'd only kept up her life insurance. if shed only told us where to look to see if there was one.. something that said we could go on to try to recoup any of the costs involved when you bury someone.
My excitement is wrapped up in what I am already accomplishing. What lied beyond my horizon. And my future's so bright, i have to wear shades > :)
* From a seed, knowledge will come... *
It all started when I got a note from my insurance advisor saying that he'd like to meet with me to review a renew of my life insurance policy. Straight forward - however, timing was of the essence. I had to drive all the way to the office to see him at a time that would work for both of us, in and amongst my busy schedule at the time, review my policy and decide if changes needed to be made and he could try to work me into a renewal. In hindsight, that was probably the best thing he could have done for me at that moment of my life.. and of course.. my life insurance coverage!
Life insurance.. Hmm what a concept huh? I finally hit 40, I've had a few different coverages for life insurance and had to let a few go over the years, but all in all, I knew I needed to leave something behind to those that I love and to take care of things after my leaving. So I had it.
I went into his office and sat and read my policy, from what I could understand, and listened to his reasoning for renewing NOW instead of a few years down the road when I was older, explained the difference in cost to me... but not once did he explain that I wasn't going to be covered if I didn't renew it when it was due.... I had no idea what I bought, signed for and was paying for monthly.. except the knowledge that I thought that if something happened to me in the next few years, and I died.. TK was going to have some money left to her. Not a lot either, and again, knowing what I know now - not nearly enough for her to do the things I had in my plans when I purchased it.
I was 30+, a newly single mother, and I just wanted to know that if I were to die, she would be able to pay for the costs that come at my death, and maybe something to invest for her future life that I wouldn't be there for.
My first husband and I paid for our own wedding. We got a bit of help, but it wasn't the extravagant and elaborate that little girls dream of. I borrowed my dress, we picked the sub-par site in the park we wanted to be married in, and 2 wks before the wedding, the catering company/restaurant we planned to hold our reception with, told us that we wouldn't be allowed to have any minors in the building after 9pm... so I called everyone on the list and said"It's now POT LUCK!"
Now skip ahead 10 yrs from that date, and I'm looking over my life insurance policy and worrying about the impending end of its coverage... and I'm seeing how badly that could end up if it were to end in 4 yrs. I don't plan on being dead within 4 yrs... my coverage is a small amount that isn't really based on any tangible numbers other than "Sure - I can afford that."
After that call from the insurance agent, I had some questions, and went to a local businessman and friend and asked what I was really looking at on this piece of paper, what the technical jargon meant, and how it was going to effect me and my current situation.
He came over - we looked at what I had, and we included DH in the process. I found out that my investment wasn't healthy like I thought it should be by now, and that DH and the 3 kids weren't so much as considered along our paths.... time for a change.
Now fast forward back to present day....
This past weekend, DH and I went in and completed our pre-licensing exam for Life Insurance. We passed, and we're both so proud of each other. That wasn't the simplest task I've ever done, but for the first time in a very long time, I was not afraid of failing the exam. I wanted to know what I learned...
Now, I have life insurance that covers me and the three kids, and an investment that is actually moving in an upward motion instead of slowly disintegrating because of inflation rates, potential tax implications etc... an Im on mu way to a new career to help other families and single moms (okay, other people too! lol) ... and I know that what I'm doing now is making a difference for her when she turns 18.
I can't remember how excited I was to write an exam that took many hours to write. I can't remember the last time I looked at myself in the mirror and knew in my heart that I was going to be ok... and if anything happened to me, so would TK.
Did YOU know that there are taxes AT death...? That the government wants money just because we died? I didn't. I also didn't know just how much leaving something for my daughter mattered until that moment that I moved my insurance and investment (though small) somewhere else. Somewhere that was moving my money and it was increasing instead of just sitting around for someone else to take it over.
When my mom died, I had NO idea what was in the wil. I could barely function then between new baby and caring for my mom's failing health on a daily basis. If she'd only kept up her life insurance. if shed only told us where to look to see if there was one.. something that said we could go on to try to recoup any of the costs involved when you bury someone.
My excitement is wrapped up in what I am already accomplishing. What lied beyond my horizon. And my future's so bright, i have to wear shades > :)
Monday, July 18, 2011
Refer to March 21/2011 and then come back and read...
It's a gorgeous day outside.
Here I sit.. sipping a glass of chilled white wine.. all by myself ... enjoying some tunes on the radio... and thinking.
I went back and was reading my previous posts... wondering what I've posted and trying to discern whats still stuck in my head .. floating around that needs to come out. When I ran across the March 21 post.
Today I was talking to one of my mentors.. asking if I am by nature a "positive" person or not. I certainly think I am, but I wanted an outsider's opinion today.
He said, Yes. You have a gift to see past whatever issues are going on - and that's not to say that you are ignoring them - you're seeing PAST them, and feeling the positive things and influences in your life instead of being sucked under by the issues.
Ok... my thoughts are somewhat on track with what some think of me. That's good to me. Someone that I respect and look up to recognizes that about me. YAY!
I could sit here and list off a million things "wrong" or "going wrong" in my world.. but my optimism is keeping me up in my happy place. (without needing to resort to the fetal position!) and really.. there IS a lot of crap going on in my world... but who's got the energy to be negative? You only get one shot on this big go round, and I want mine to be better than wallowing in self pity.
however - I have to say this... after reading march 21, I'm still sick that some, that say they love me and that I matter to them, are still friends with my ex on FB. Why, you ask? Because what you do on FB - even if you have blocked someone, not just deleted, but gone so far as to block them - they can figure enough out via posts and photos posted by your friends. yuppers. Read that again.... they can either figure out whats going on in your life by photos posted by friends, or the little bits of posts that they CAN see on your mutual friends wall can very easily be figured out by following the conversation. Its just like being on the phone... sure its one sided, and you really DON'T know what the blocked person said... but it usually isnt far off if you guess the topic or comment. especially if the blocked party lived with the blockee. Some things are habitual.
I've had friends ask me to delete their recently ex'd partners.. and I usually do, because I really don't have any interest in remaining friends with them on FB because I don't need to be connected to them. (Does that make sense?)
I accept that a couple of our mutual friends will keep the connection open for their own personal needs or reasons... and I know they won't share whats going on in MY life with them. I trust that. But that's only a couple of them.
Lucky for me, recently someone I thought was my friend chose my ex and those friends over me. I was deleted off FB as her friend, and I actually couldn't be happier. If I'm not the one you want to be friends with in real life, I'm all the more pleased to not have to delete you in order to maintain my sanity over what I post or what you might post, thank you very much.
For now, her kids are my friends - but that won't last long. Just trying to preserve peaceful and condusive conversation if required at that moment... but we'll see how that goes, right?
Here I sit.. sipping a glass of chilled white wine.. all by myself ... enjoying some tunes on the radio... and thinking.
I went back and was reading my previous posts... wondering what I've posted and trying to discern whats still stuck in my head .. floating around that needs to come out. When I ran across the March 21 post.
Today I was talking to one of my mentors.. asking if I am by nature a "positive" person or not. I certainly think I am, but I wanted an outsider's opinion today.
He said, Yes. You have a gift to see past whatever issues are going on - and that's not to say that you are ignoring them - you're seeing PAST them, and feeling the positive things and influences in your life instead of being sucked under by the issues.
Ok... my thoughts are somewhat on track with what some think of me. That's good to me. Someone that I respect and look up to recognizes that about me. YAY!
I could sit here and list off a million things "wrong" or "going wrong" in my world.. but my optimism is keeping me up in my happy place. (without needing to resort to the fetal position!) and really.. there IS a lot of crap going on in my world... but who's got the energy to be negative? You only get one shot on this big go round, and I want mine to be better than wallowing in self pity.
however - I have to say this... after reading march 21, I'm still sick that some, that say they love me and that I matter to them, are still friends with my ex on FB. Why, you ask? Because what you do on FB - even if you have blocked someone, not just deleted, but gone so far as to block them - they can figure enough out via posts and photos posted by your friends. yuppers. Read that again.... they can either figure out whats going on in your life by photos posted by friends, or the little bits of posts that they CAN see on your mutual friends wall can very easily be figured out by following the conversation. Its just like being on the phone... sure its one sided, and you really DON'T know what the blocked person said... but it usually isnt far off if you guess the topic or comment. especially if the blocked party lived with the blockee. Some things are habitual.
I've had friends ask me to delete their recently ex'd partners.. and I usually do, because I really don't have any interest in remaining friends with them on FB because I don't need to be connected to them. (Does that make sense?)
I accept that a couple of our mutual friends will keep the connection open for their own personal needs or reasons... and I know they won't share whats going on in MY life with them. I trust that. But that's only a couple of them.
Lucky for me, recently someone I thought was my friend chose my ex and those friends over me. I was deleted off FB as her friend, and I actually couldn't be happier. If I'm not the one you want to be friends with in real life, I'm all the more pleased to not have to delete you in order to maintain my sanity over what I post or what you might post, thank you very much.
For now, her kids are my friends - but that won't last long. Just trying to preserve peaceful and condusive conversation if required at that moment... but we'll see how that goes, right?
Overheard conversation...
Dad: Chase... what are you doing?... Where did that dirt come from?...
Kenzie.. where did the dirt come from? ...
Okay... was this dirt in here before?
Kenzie... Chase... come HERE! ....
Where did you get this dirt?
Was it in the house?
No.. it wasn't... it was over there in the garden, wasn't it?
Kenzie: ... but...
Dad: I told you guys not to play with this dirt. Its got poo in it.... its poo dirt... its called "Manure" ..
Chase: Poo dirt?
Dad: Yes.. its got poo in it, and now you have poo soup... and you're running it through your hair now, stop. You filled my bucket... with poo dirt... and made poo soup. Now I want you to go dump it out.
Dump it.
Kenzie: ... but...
Dad: Use teamwork and go dump it.
(Dad goes inside)
Chase: Kenzie!!! C'mon!!! It's TEAMWORK TIME!!!
*LOL*
and this is what I picture I might find if I peeked over my fence after that conversation...
Kenzie.. where did the dirt come from? ...
Okay... was this dirt in here before?
Kenzie... Chase... come HERE! ....
Where did you get this dirt?
Was it in the house?
No.. it wasn't... it was over there in the garden, wasn't it?
Kenzie: ... but...
Dad: I told you guys not to play with this dirt. Its got poo in it.... its poo dirt... its called "Manure" ..
Chase: Poo dirt?
Dad: Yes.. its got poo in it, and now you have poo soup... and you're running it through your hair now, stop. You filled my bucket... with poo dirt... and made poo soup. Now I want you to go dump it out.
Dump it.
Kenzie: ... but...
Dad: Use teamwork and go dump it.
(Dad goes inside)
Chase: Kenzie!!! C'mon!!! It's TEAMWORK TIME!!!
*LOL*
and this is what I picture I might find if I peeked over my fence after that conversation...
Saturday, July 2, 2011
Canada Day!
Well, it's actually now July 2nd, but the festivities in the house are still going on.
Upstairs, the ladies are all laughing and playing cards and listening to music. Downstairs outside, the guys are jamming and singing on the guitar.
The two kids are upstairs playing video games.
I have a headache. A nasty one that has kept me laying low most of the day, unfortunately.
I was talking to a girlfriend the other day, and she asked if I noticed that there seems to be an awful lot of "crap" going on in everyone's lives right now.. the world in general. She said its because the universe is in a major shift. After watching the news a couple nights ago and seeing that Greece is facing economic breakdown, experiencing first hand the economic shift going on in my own life.. I guess I could believe that.
So it's definitely time for some new things to start going on in my world. I've signed up for some training that could lead to something new in my career field, which of course, I'd be adding to finishing up my Interior Decorating diploma and finding something I'd love to do in that field as well. But it would be nice to know that I could go through the ups and downs in time and jobs with both fields without much conflict.
Around the beginning of June I was officially laid off from my job. There just isn't much retail traffic going on. I'm sad, but I'm not complaining too much. Having the time off at the end of the school year sure made it a little easier to get TK back and forth from school on all those half days and parties she had going on.
I was really hoping today would be a great day for the three of us to spend the day hanging out and enjoying the Canada Day celebrations.. but unfortunately the headache got the better of my day. But on the other side, TK had a nice lazy day, and has had someone to play with since about 4pm.
They boys have changed to making up lyrics to whatever the guitar man plays... so I'm going to call it a night and sneak off to bed and see if I can make this thing go away.
Sweet dreams... wherever you are. Happy Canada Day!
Upstairs, the ladies are all laughing and playing cards and listening to music. Downstairs outside, the guys are jamming and singing on the guitar.
The two kids are upstairs playing video games.
I have a headache. A nasty one that has kept me laying low most of the day, unfortunately.
I was talking to a girlfriend the other day, and she asked if I noticed that there seems to be an awful lot of "crap" going on in everyone's lives right now.. the world in general. She said its because the universe is in a major shift. After watching the news a couple nights ago and seeing that Greece is facing economic breakdown, experiencing first hand the economic shift going on in my own life.. I guess I could believe that.
So it's definitely time for some new things to start going on in my world. I've signed up for some training that could lead to something new in my career field, which of course, I'd be adding to finishing up my Interior Decorating diploma and finding something I'd love to do in that field as well. But it would be nice to know that I could go through the ups and downs in time and jobs with both fields without much conflict.
Around the beginning of June I was officially laid off from my job. There just isn't much retail traffic going on. I'm sad, but I'm not complaining too much. Having the time off at the end of the school year sure made it a little easier to get TK back and forth from school on all those half days and parties she had going on.
I was really hoping today would be a great day for the three of us to spend the day hanging out and enjoying the Canada Day celebrations.. but unfortunately the headache got the better of my day. But on the other side, TK had a nice lazy day, and has had someone to play with since about 4pm.
They boys have changed to making up lyrics to whatever the guitar man plays... so I'm going to call it a night and sneak off to bed and see if I can make this thing go away.
Sweet dreams... wherever you are. Happy Canada Day!
Monday, June 6, 2011
Has summer finally arrived?
We've all been complaining about the lack of Spring. The past couple days of nice warm sunshine has definitely turned everyone's spirits. (Thank goodness!)
Its been a busy couple days around here. Thursday I went to work for another client of mine, he needed help in the garden, a few things around the house and some computer stuff. We had agreed on rain or shine.. and unfortunately, that rain showed up. But I managed to get all the flowers into the beds despite the downpour. That night, DH had ball and I opted not to go, only because I'd already spent the day getting wet and cold.
I had begged him to skip, but he said they needed him, so I puttered around the house while TK and TKU played Xbox 360 upstairs. When he got home, I convinced him to play the board game I'd set up earlier in hopes that he'd stay home. As soon as the game was done, he leaned back on the couch and in mid-coherent sentence, his eyes rolled back in his head and he completely fell asleep! Sometimes I think he's narcoleptic. LOL.
I really have no idea how anyone can fall asleep that quickly. It's the same when we crawl into bed at night. It isn't always because its late when we get there either. But really.. under a minute and he's completely out and snoring. At least I managed to get him off the couch and into bed within about 30 mins. That might be a household record for shortest time.
Friday was a good night.. despite the bits of arguing with TK about what she could do. Usually she and TKU like to go swimming, but the deal was that she couldn't go unless her room was cleaned up AND her homework was all done. She was home by 3:45... I got home at 5:30 and neither was done. So my answer was no. Along with the conversation that homework had to be done at the very least. however somewhere in that - it turned into complete refusal and a promise to do it Saturday.
Saturday I had to go to work and the girls were left to get their chores done for the couple hrs that everyone would be out working. DH got home to find them outside lying in the sun and painting their toes. No homework even started. *sigh* I called and talked to her at 3 and she said she wanted to do her homework with ME.. (huh?) So obviously when I got home - no homework in sight. I managed to get her to do her reading for English at least.. so we set up the tent in the backyard - and the two of them slept in it ... all night! I was pretty surprised actually. I figured TK would be up for it, but TKU chickens out - so I expected she'd be bailing before midnight and opting for her own bed. But they managed to stick it out all night and have a good time.
Ahh.. Sunday - my day off... got some things tidied up around the house, laundry folded and put away and all of a sudden, it's like noon. Where does the time go? DH had ball.. 1:30 and 4:30 games. So after MUCH arguing with TK that she had to come, we managed to all get out and to the field in time. With the double header the team does hot dogs for lunch. We packed three of the water guns too, and during the second game TK found a couple boys to play with. That was a bunch of fun for sure! I had to make a run to the store and we passed a yard sale.. so TK and I stopped to check it out. She scored a pair or Heelies - those runners with wheels in the heels for $5, and a game for her DS for $4. I was checking out some funky glasses, and a lovely set of 6 coffee mugs that I really would have liked to get, was a little more concerned about how much cash I had on hand for her stuff.. so I didn't get them. When we got in the car, TK asked why I didn't get them - "They're only $1.50 mom!" as we drove on to the store and proceeded to count out the rest of the small change in my wallet stating that indeed, I could get them if we stopped on the way back to the park.
So .. we stopped, and she headed out with her mit full of dimes and nickels that had been badly weighing down my purse... to get what I THOUGHT were my coffee mugs; only to come back with the funky curvy glasses instead. LOL! (somewhat like this, only frosted and I think they're a little more bent)
I'm pretty sure these AREN'T what I expected to come back, but they're not bad either. I could have used the coffee cups though. lol I guess this means I have to do some more yard sale-ing to find myself a set of 6 matching coffee mugs that I'd be willing to take home. *smirk*
We got home, the girls had a water balloon fight, then a water gun fight that included TKU2 as well. Figured out something for dinner and I turned on a movie - Julie / Julia. TK decided she wanted to watch too. Apparently DH had a very important meeting with the inside of his eyelids because I don't think he got all the way through half of the movie.
I got TK to bed, with some cuddle time, and managed to peel DH off the couch and pour him into bed too... And just as quickly as Sunday arrived.. it was gone again.
So .. this morning being my second day off and not having anyone home to distract, annoy or otherwise get under foot - I have plans. BIG plans.
Laundry, dishes, recycle, bottle depot, clean the bathroom, tidy the back patio and rearrange things, and possibly get out to the back flower beds to get some weeding done so we can try to plant something in there to make it beautiful.
Here's to plans becoming reality!
how was YOUR weekend?
Its been a busy couple days around here. Thursday I went to work for another client of mine, he needed help in the garden, a few things around the house and some computer stuff. We had agreed on rain or shine.. and unfortunately, that rain showed up. But I managed to get all the flowers into the beds despite the downpour. That night, DH had ball and I opted not to go, only because I'd already spent the day getting wet and cold.
I had begged him to skip, but he said they needed him, so I puttered around the house while TK and TKU played Xbox 360 upstairs. When he got home, I convinced him to play the board game I'd set up earlier in hopes that he'd stay home. As soon as the game was done, he leaned back on the couch and in mid-coherent sentence, his eyes rolled back in his head and he completely fell asleep! Sometimes I think he's narcoleptic. LOL.
I really have no idea how anyone can fall asleep that quickly. It's the same when we crawl into bed at night. It isn't always because its late when we get there either. But really.. under a minute and he's completely out and snoring. At least I managed to get him off the couch and into bed within about 30 mins. That might be a household record for shortest time.
Friday was a good night.. despite the bits of arguing with TK about what she could do. Usually she and TKU like to go swimming, but the deal was that she couldn't go unless her room was cleaned up AND her homework was all done. She was home by 3:45... I got home at 5:30 and neither was done. So my answer was no. Along with the conversation that homework had to be done at the very least. however somewhere in that - it turned into complete refusal and a promise to do it Saturday.
Saturday I had to go to work and the girls were left to get their chores done for the couple hrs that everyone would be out working. DH got home to find them outside lying in the sun and painting their toes. No homework even started. *sigh* I called and talked to her at 3 and she said she wanted to do her homework with ME.. (huh?) So obviously when I got home - no homework in sight. I managed to get her to do her reading for English at least.. so we set up the tent in the backyard - and the two of them slept in it ... all night! I was pretty surprised actually. I figured TK would be up for it, but TKU chickens out - so I expected she'd be bailing before midnight and opting for her own bed. But they managed to stick it out all night and have a good time.
Ahh.. Sunday - my day off... got some things tidied up around the house, laundry folded and put away and all of a sudden, it's like noon. Where does the time go? DH had ball.. 1:30 and 4:30 games. So after MUCH arguing with TK that she had to come, we managed to all get out and to the field in time. With the double header the team does hot dogs for lunch. We packed three of the water guns too, and during the second game TK found a couple boys to play with. That was a bunch of fun for sure! I had to make a run to the store and we passed a yard sale.. so TK and I stopped to check it out. She scored a pair or Heelies - those runners with wheels in the heels for $5, and a game for her DS for $4. I was checking out some funky glasses, and a lovely set of 6 coffee mugs that I really would have liked to get, was a little more concerned about how much cash I had on hand for her stuff.. so I didn't get them. When we got in the car, TK asked why I didn't get them - "They're only $1.50 mom!" as we drove on to the store and proceeded to count out the rest of the small change in my wallet stating that indeed, I could get them if we stopped on the way back to the park.
So .. we stopped, and she headed out with her mit full of dimes and nickels that had been badly weighing down my purse... to get what I THOUGHT were my coffee mugs; only to come back with the funky curvy glasses instead. LOL! (somewhat like this, only frosted and I think they're a little more bent)
We got home, the girls had a water balloon fight, then a water gun fight that included TKU2 as well. Figured out something for dinner and I turned on a movie - Julie / Julia. TK decided she wanted to watch too. Apparently DH had a very important meeting with the inside of his eyelids because I don't think he got all the way through half of the movie.
I got TK to bed, with some cuddle time, and managed to peel DH off the couch and pour him into bed too... And just as quickly as Sunday arrived.. it was gone again.
So .. this morning being my second day off and not having anyone home to distract, annoy or otherwise get under foot - I have plans. BIG plans.
Laundry, dishes, recycle, bottle depot, clean the bathroom, tidy the back patio and rearrange things, and possibly get out to the back flower beds to get some weeding done so we can try to plant something in there to make it beautiful.
Here's to plans becoming reality!
how was YOUR weekend?
Monday, May 30, 2011
Almost June...
Wow.. what is UP with this weather. Mind you - I can remember back into my younger years and remembering the odd freak snow fall in May..this isn't really that bad.
Just finished another of the courses for my Interior Decorating Diploma. YAY! So far, what have I taken.. Hmm let's see...
This is what I've taken so far.. 166 hrs of req'd 340
CORE - 60 hrs
Basics of Design – Prerequisite to all decorating courses
Color
Light
ELECTIVES - 100 hrs
Apartments & Condominiums
Fibers to Fabrics
Furniture Selection
Space Planning
Accessories
SKILL ENHANCEMENT
Decorating with a Green Attitude - 6 hrs
Just over half way. Not bad. Hoping they put in a couple more that I need/ want and can get those done in the fall. YAY! :)
What you been up to?
Just finished another of the courses for my Interior Decorating Diploma. YAY! So far, what have I taken.. Hmm let's see...
This is what I've taken so far.. 166 hrs of req'd 340
CORE - 60 hrs
Basics of Design – Prerequisite to all decorating courses
Color
Light
ELECTIVES - 100 hrs
Apartments & Condominiums
Fibers to Fabrics
Furniture Selection
Space Planning
Accessories
SKILL ENHANCEMENT
Decorating with a Green Attitude - 6 hrs
Just over half way. Not bad. Hoping they put in a couple more that I need/ want and can get those done in the fall. YAY! :)
What you been up to?
Friday, May 27, 2011
Have I told you lately?
I know I know... so sue me. I've been busy too.
We're nearing now two months since we moved in here. The place is a HUGE space difference.. which makes a completely different impact on our lives. The master bedroom is small..I mean - I'm sure Rachel's last room was bigger. But we make due. Its all about enjoying all the other places in the house too, right?
I'm sitting here.. at nearly midnight - trying to build my friend's 40th Bday video for her party tomorrow... not sure I'll get it done.. but I'll do what I can and do my best doing so. No one had any YOUNGER photos of her. I had to get her hubby to infiltrate the storage room and find me one. Luck - but so much later years ones .. and people sent a lot of wedding ones.. (like I wouldnt have those?) .. ah well.. it will be whatever it is... the girls are doing a FAB job with the decorations and planning. I cant wait to see it all do down tomorrow. :)
okay .. there you've heard from me... :) I'll be back. I apologize for my lengthy absence.
We're nearing now two months since we moved in here. The place is a HUGE space difference.. which makes a completely different impact on our lives. The master bedroom is small..I mean - I'm sure Rachel's last room was bigger. But we make due. Its all about enjoying all the other places in the house too, right?
I'm sitting here.. at nearly midnight - trying to build my friend's 40th Bday video for her party tomorrow... not sure I'll get it done.. but I'll do what I can and do my best doing so. No one had any YOUNGER photos of her. I had to get her hubby to infiltrate the storage room and find me one. Luck - but so much later years ones .. and people sent a lot of wedding ones.. (like I wouldnt have those?) .. ah well.. it will be whatever it is... the girls are doing a FAB job with the decorations and planning. I cant wait to see it all do down tomorrow. :)
okay .. there you've heard from me... :) I'll be back. I apologize for my lengthy absence.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Packing on Monday
Welcome to Monday again!
It's my "Sunday".. so I get to putter around the house pretty much by myself on Mondays.
Part of the morning I spend farting around on FB... playing Zuma, catching up with my friends and doing a little 'fb house cleaning". Today I got up and did a little of that, but it's Spring Break, so TKU came down with pancakes for the two of us, and we bantered about not much, she helped me pack some dishes, and we played with the Dr. Ho machine.. LOL .. (she won't try it herself yet.. LOL)
For now, she's gone out with her mom, and I'm out of life on Zuma.. so I thought I'd come and update here.
Packing is ... well.. I guess I'd say half done. There are still a number of small things that have to get packed, but a lot of big things you can't do anything with and will get moved "as is".. but its coming along. I'm REALLY glad I started packing March 1. The bonus is that there are still other things to pack, but most of the nagging stuff is out of the way, and it FEELS like I've made progress.
Last weekend we realized that the UFC was on this weekend... and it was our turn to host. There are 4 'families' of us that host each time its on and we take turns. 2 are in our house, 2 are in another house down the street from where we are now... same set up - upstairs suite / downstairs suite. We ended up with 12 people in our little living room this past Saturday night, and it worked out pretty well!
So all the boxes that I've been packing up until March 18 got moved into the storage space under the stairs, and emptied out pretty much every box we've packed so far... and looking around, it felt like NOTHING had been done yet. Its interesting how perception works. No boxes all stacked up everywhere basically told my brain that nothing had been packed yet... and I felt a little bit of a panic! So yesterday I packed a couple more boxes, today I've done a few more too... and I'll probably get a good chunk of all the little things done - and THAT will be great.
I was lucky enough to have a friend who just moved who was happy to donate her boxes to our cause. And when we're all done, I'll store a fair amount of the boxes for next time, and donate to some to another friend who will be moving too. I know that new place will have enough storage that I can keep a lot of boxes after we're done. Somehow I feel better knowing I have enough to start again when it comes time. But I am looking forward to actually going through each and every box and bin that's packed right now and getting rid of stuff, or putting it out to use. Very little is going to be "stored". It's no wonder the off site storage places make so much money... everyone's got 'stuff'.. and they plan to keep it! I will have a couple boxes that are memory/keepsake things, but it won't nearly be enough that if we didn't have as much storage as we're moving to - that I'd have to get an off-site storage locker. That would make me crazy!
We find out on the 23rd what exactly is going on with the move. The owners are moving back east and the husband is there now finalizing details etc. I assume on a job and / or their new home. I'd like to hear on the 23rd that they're leaving that week and we are welcome to move in a bit early. Gotta love not having to move everything in one day with a mad rush to get out of one place and get it cleaned on time. And there will be a fair amount of cleaning to do here before I'd tell the landlord that we're out. Hopefully we have a couple days to just clean empty space. But we'll deal with whatever we get.
Anyway... I guess that's it. I should get up and pack some more so I have a little less to trip over... :)
It's my "Sunday".. so I get to putter around the house pretty much by myself on Mondays.
Part of the morning I spend farting around on FB... playing Zuma, catching up with my friends and doing a little 'fb house cleaning". Today I got up and did a little of that, but it's Spring Break, so TKU came down with pancakes for the two of us, and we bantered about not much, she helped me pack some dishes, and we played with the Dr. Ho machine.. LOL .. (she won't try it herself yet.. LOL)
For now, she's gone out with her mom, and I'm out of life on Zuma.. so I thought I'd come and update here.
Packing is ... well.. I guess I'd say half done. There are still a number of small things that have to get packed, but a lot of big things you can't do anything with and will get moved "as is".. but its coming along. I'm REALLY glad I started packing March 1. The bonus is that there are still other things to pack, but most of the nagging stuff is out of the way, and it FEELS like I've made progress.
Last weekend we realized that the UFC was on this weekend... and it was our turn to host. There are 4 'families' of us that host each time its on and we take turns. 2 are in our house, 2 are in another house down the street from where we are now... same set up - upstairs suite / downstairs suite. We ended up with 12 people in our little living room this past Saturday night, and it worked out pretty well!
So all the boxes that I've been packing up until March 18 got moved into the storage space under the stairs, and emptied out pretty much every box we've packed so far... and looking around, it felt like NOTHING had been done yet. Its interesting how perception works. No boxes all stacked up everywhere basically told my brain that nothing had been packed yet... and I felt a little bit of a panic! So yesterday I packed a couple more boxes, today I've done a few more too... and I'll probably get a good chunk of all the little things done - and THAT will be great.
I was lucky enough to have a friend who just moved who was happy to donate her boxes to our cause. And when we're all done, I'll store a fair amount of the boxes for next time, and donate to some to another friend who will be moving too. I know that new place will have enough storage that I can keep a lot of boxes after we're done. Somehow I feel better knowing I have enough to start again when it comes time. But I am looking forward to actually going through each and every box and bin that's packed right now and getting rid of stuff, or putting it out to use. Very little is going to be "stored". It's no wonder the off site storage places make so much money... everyone's got 'stuff'.. and they plan to keep it! I will have a couple boxes that are memory/keepsake things, but it won't nearly be enough that if we didn't have as much storage as we're moving to - that I'd have to get an off-site storage locker. That would make me crazy!
We find out on the 23rd what exactly is going on with the move. The owners are moving back east and the husband is there now finalizing details etc. I assume on a job and / or their new home. I'd like to hear on the 23rd that they're leaving that week and we are welcome to move in a bit early. Gotta love not having to move everything in one day with a mad rush to get out of one place and get it cleaned on time. And there will be a fair amount of cleaning to do here before I'd tell the landlord that we're out. Hopefully we have a couple days to just clean empty space. But we'll deal with whatever we get.
Anyway... I guess that's it. I should get up and pack some more so I have a little less to trip over... :)
Friday, March 18, 2011
Yours, Mine, and OURS....
I can't help it...
When my friend breaks up with someone that I've befriended just because of him/her ... when that relationship ends... I am 99% likely to end any and pretty much ALL friendship with their now "ex".
Kim and Ben are dating.. I've known Kim for a while, and she introduces me to her man Ben... Ben has an account on facebook... she has access to his account, or he just adds me as a friend... blah blah.. I've met Ben a few times.. we've invited them out or over to our place.. visa versa.. so all goes... until Kim and Ben are no longer together. Ben is pretty much deleted from my fb friends. That's kind of it for me. And I'm having a hard time figuring out WHY some of my friends insist on still being 'friends' with my ex. Not just facebook.. but that's a pretty good start...
I mean.. do you talk to my ex all the time? Did you before? Probably not. You comment back and forth on statuses.. or pictures... and still... you probably wouldnt go over to his place if he invited you for dinner with his new g/f... but it's okay in our mind, to be his friend on fb. I don't get it.
Maybe I'm just really loyal to my friends over the benefits their ex is going to give me. Sure, I'm friends with my current b/f's ex wife on FB. I am, because if I have pics of the kids to send her, I want access. If I have things going on in our world I think she might benefit to know .. there it is. But don't get me wrong... we are not "friends". She'l blocked from all kinds of things.... and we don't sit and gab about whats going on in our worlds. .. and that IS completely different from what Im getting at here.
Last count... the 5 people that are closest to me, or that I consider closest to me are still fb friends with my ex....and it bothers me, and it makes me mad.. and I am hurt. And I really am not quite sure why Im harbouring the drama of it all.
(sigh)... Must sleep... tomorrow is a new day... right? =)
When my friend breaks up with someone that I've befriended just because of him/her ... when that relationship ends... I am 99% likely to end any and pretty much ALL friendship with their now "ex".
Kim and Ben are dating.. I've known Kim for a while, and she introduces me to her man Ben... Ben has an account on facebook... she has access to his account, or he just adds me as a friend... blah blah.. I've met Ben a few times.. we've invited them out or over to our place.. visa versa.. so all goes... until Kim and Ben are no longer together. Ben is pretty much deleted from my fb friends. That's kind of it for me. And I'm having a hard time figuring out WHY some of my friends insist on still being 'friends' with my ex. Not just facebook.. but that's a pretty good start...
I mean.. do you talk to my ex all the time? Did you before? Probably not. You comment back and forth on statuses.. or pictures... and still... you probably wouldnt go over to his place if he invited you for dinner with his new g/f... but it's okay in our mind, to be his friend on fb. I don't get it.
Maybe I'm just really loyal to my friends over the benefits their ex is going to give me. Sure, I'm friends with my current b/f's ex wife on FB. I am, because if I have pics of the kids to send her, I want access. If I have things going on in our world I think she might benefit to know .. there it is. But don't get me wrong... we are not "friends". She'l blocked from all kinds of things.... and we don't sit and gab about whats going on in our worlds. .. and that IS completely different from what Im getting at here.
Last count... the 5 people that are closest to me, or that I consider closest to me are still fb friends with my ex....and it bothers me, and it makes me mad.. and I am hurt. And I really am not quite sure why Im harbouring the drama of it all.
(sigh)... Must sleep... tomorrow is a new day... right? =)
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Future prospects...
So ... something that has been dancing through my mind for the last little while popped its head up tonight.
J came downstairs after spending a few hours talking on the phone to his brother back east - to tell SO that they could have work back home for more than they make here.
Ontario is a long way away from BC. Sure.. it's just a 5 hr plane ride. But at the best of times that flight is kind of expensive. So it makes me think about what's here for me that I think I need to stay for...
I wouldn't miss paying way too much just to keep a roof over our heads. I can't say I couldn't get a job there. I wouldn't say that it would be hard to make friends. And I still have the power of the internet to keep up communication with family and friends wherever I am or they are.
So, the only thing that makes this a really tough decision (which isn`t something I have to really consider right now anyway) is TK.
Sure... there`s that underlying agreement that at the end of this school year she`s supposed to go live with her dad full time. But if everything worked out the way its supposed to... it would make SO`s life easier being closer to his kids and his family. Especially right now - there is definitely more time needed for him to spend time and energy with his kids right now. and come next year - his family will be renovating their home and they`ve asked me to come help. I also have my gf in New York that would like me to come out to help her decorate. And I don`t doubt that working with both of those homes will bring me some word of mouth referrals - which would be great.
Still... its a BIG move for me, and for TK. and I am pretty sure her dad won`t let her move there. that`s just way too far and too much for him.
Its not something i have to think about too much right now.. but its on the table... again. *sigh*.
J came downstairs after spending a few hours talking on the phone to his brother back east - to tell SO that they could have work back home for more than they make here.
Ontario is a long way away from BC. Sure.. it's just a 5 hr plane ride. But at the best of times that flight is kind of expensive. So it makes me think about what's here for me that I think I need to stay for...
- my daughter
- my job
- my friends
- my family
I wouldn't miss paying way too much just to keep a roof over our heads. I can't say I couldn't get a job there. I wouldn't say that it would be hard to make friends. And I still have the power of the internet to keep up communication with family and friends wherever I am or they are.
So, the only thing that makes this a really tough decision (which isn`t something I have to really consider right now anyway) is TK.
Sure... there`s that underlying agreement that at the end of this school year she`s supposed to go live with her dad full time. But if everything worked out the way its supposed to... it would make SO`s life easier being closer to his kids and his family. Especially right now - there is definitely more time needed for him to spend time and energy with his kids right now. and come next year - his family will be renovating their home and they`ve asked me to come help. I also have my gf in New York that would like me to come out to help her decorate. And I don`t doubt that working with both of those homes will bring me some word of mouth referrals - which would be great.
Still... its a BIG move for me, and for TK. and I am pretty sure her dad won`t let her move there. that`s just way too far and too much for him.
Its not something i have to think about too much right now.. but its on the table... again. *sigh*.
Friday, March 11, 2011
Changing ground
Well - we went to see a house last nite, and quite simply - it was the very last option. We have seen so many homes with all the right details, in all different areas that we'd be comfortable to live in, but that was in February, when most people wanted them re-rented for March 1... not April 1 when we would be able to move. I saw this ad on February 4th, and managed to run across it again by fluke STILL available. I emailed and was happy to find that the family was not yet sold on new tenants yet.
We went last nite - the WHOLE family was able to make it - and everyone fell in love!
I had been talking to TKU on facebook earlier and mentioned that I was excited to go see this place and that I was really hoping everything was good because I just wanted to know that we had a home, get packed and moved without any issues.. and that's when she said
"I'm not living there. Just saying. We are just looking." ...
I just about lost my mind. Ya know, kid, I love ya, and I understand that moving away from your friends and school and all that is hard sometimes, but I'm really hoping that you don't have nearly as much pull on your parents as that. All that flashed through my mind was the potential nightmare for her parents and their sanity for the same thing - we just want to know that we have a place, it fits all of our needs, and we can afford it. We all needed the peace of mind of knowing.
We already know that TKU's older sister is moving back home again. (she went back east to live with her dad a couple months ago if not less than that - and it didn't work out the way she'd hoped - so she called and said she wanted to come home.) .. and we already know that she's not going to be thrilled with the new location because she wanted to go to a specific high school.. that is now too far. I'm not saying its not possible, because my best friend did it for Gr. 12. We were already in that school and her family had to move back east for her step dad's job. She moved in with her aunt out in Ridge and commuted every day to school for the last year instead of changing schools. That just made sense. But she was in grade 12 and had her license and a car to get herself there and back every day. TKU2 will have to be driven every day.
I of course, got the address and google mapped it, checked it out on street view, and was delighted to see that it wasn't scary at all! I got an email from the landlady along with pictures. She said the house was staged in January, and those were all she had. What I noticed was missing was the living room / kitchen downstairs photo. Since that will be my family's space, I was curious to know if the set up there was going to be any better than what I am currently fighting with. She very nicely replied that they live in the house at present, and it's their son's play room. Its an open concept space sharing both living room and kitchen areas together. And that it would be easier to visualize when we came to see it.
We went last nite - the WHOLE family was able to make it - and everyone fell in love!
I had been talking to TKU on facebook earlier and mentioned that I was excited to go see this place and that I was really hoping everything was good because I just wanted to know that we had a home, get packed and moved without any issues.. and that's when she said
"I'm not living there. Just saying. We are just looking." ...
I just about lost my mind. Ya know, kid, I love ya, and I understand that moving away from your friends and school and all that is hard sometimes, but I'm really hoping that you don't have nearly as much pull on your parents as that. All that flashed through my mind was the potential nightmare for her parents and their sanity for the same thing - we just want to know that we have a place, it fits all of our needs, and we can afford it. We all needed the peace of mind of knowing.
We already know that TKU's older sister is moving back home again. (she went back east to live with her dad a couple months ago if not less than that - and it didn't work out the way she'd hoped - so she called and said she wanted to come home.) .. and we already know that she's not going to be thrilled with the new location because she wanted to go to a specific high school.. that is now too far. I'm not saying its not possible, because my best friend did it for Gr. 12. We were already in that school and her family had to move back east for her step dad's job. She moved in with her aunt out in Ridge and commuted every day to school for the last year instead of changing schools. That just made sense. But she was in grade 12 and had her license and a car to get herself there and back every day. TKU2 will have to be driven every day.
I of course, got the address and google mapped it, checked it out on street view, and was delighted to see that it wasn't scary at all! I got an email from the landlady along with pictures. She said the house was staged in January, and those were all she had. What I noticed was missing was the living room / kitchen downstairs photo. Since that will be my family's space, I was curious to know if the set up there was going to be any better than what I am currently fighting with. She very nicely replied that they live in the house at present, and it's their son's play room. Its an open concept space sharing both living room and kitchen areas together. And that it would be easier to visualize when we came to see it.
When we got there, it was of course, the first thing I needed to see. The home is well kept with laminate and ceramic tile throughout. The only installed carpet is on the stairs and the two downstairs bedrooms (but not the 'den'). I stood in the middle of the open space kitchen/ lrm area and tried to picture our table and chairs there. It would work for the time being, but it would have to change. I immediately started 'building' an island with a breakfast bar instead. Indeed, the kitchen is small, there is about the same amount of counter space as there is here (with all the appliances that sit on the counter).. so an island would be smart. increases counter workspace, and if the right kind of set up is done, it would definitely work for more cupboard/storage. The living room being right there would be fine. The furniture we already have in our current living room would all fit just fine.
Down the hall to the two bedrooms for our suite - they are side by side. I wasn't sure I wanted TK's room right beside ours, and I can't really see the new armoire fitting into our room at all. The 2 bedrooms are small. Smaller than what we have now. The closet in the 'master' is even smaller than we have right now. This means we'll be doing some more reconfiguration on where our stuff will go. This is about the time we figured that the den will probably end up being TK's room. It's up at the front of the house (the other bedrooms are in the back), but in either room, she would be away from the noise of the tv - which she isn't right now.
Honestly, if I were looking at this suite and it was JUST the downstairs - as in, we weren't renting the whole house - and we didnt know the people upstairs - I wouldn't take it. But because we're looking at the whole house, and all of the amenities, it will work, and we'll make it work as best we can. I joked and said it was great and we'd be happy living upstairs, and M laughed and said NO WAY! lol...
The yard is huge. There's a workshop in the back - and its one of those long buildings where there's storage space in the back half that's separated from the front. The guys are already planning setting that front space up as their Man Cave. lol
Upstairs is lovely. The layout is good, there's plenty of space and it's well used. The dining room furniture they have will fit nicely without being crowded, the living room space will do well with their current furniture too. The master bedroom, walk in closet, additional closet with shelving and en suite are all well planned out too. It is cozier - meaning the space they have upstairs now is HUGE and spacious - but for no real reason. All that extra space just screams for laundry and miscellaneous storage things to pile up. I can already see M planning out decorating it properly as soon as they're in there.
Both kids rooms upstairs are like ours downstairs - right beside each other. One is slightly bigger and TKU has already laid claim to it. And honestly, for TKU2 the extra space would just give her more room to pile things up too.
The landlords are all ok with our pets and our kids, they're nice people that have already said they feel comfortable leaving the province with us in their home. (who wouldn't? we're pretty great tenants!) So.. now we wait until March 23rd to hear about posession date etc. Promise I'll share pics when we're in.
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